Jaded Optimist

Mothering, making, and generally blathering on

The world according to C July 19, 2008

Filed under: Personal — bonniep @ 10:21 pm

On breastfeeding: “Well, you have glasses of milk in your throat, and they fill when you drink milk and then they spill over and come out your boobs.”

On the joys of teaching: Me: “Is Ms. C pregnant at your school.” C: “I dunno. Teachers don’t need to have babies mommy.” Me: “Why?” C: “Because, they TEACH.”

On tummies: C: “Mrs. N said Ms. C is pregnant. She has a baby in her big tummy. But Mrs. N has a big tummy too and she isn’t pregnant.” Me [horrified and aghast with shame at what C has probably said to her teacher]: “Well, lots of people have big tummies. I have a big tummy and there is no baby in there.” C: “Mommy, that is because your parts aren’t put back together yet.”

On where babies come from: “Well, there is a tummy, and then there is a big vat of unborn babies and the vat gets near the tummy and a hole gets cut in the tummy and one end of a tube is put in there and the other end is put in the vat and then one of those unborn babies is pumped in.”

On two teenage girls walking into the cookie store: “Hey, they don’t have any husbands. But, they are so beautiful.”

On two teenage boys talking with a teenage girl: C: “I think that is one of their wives.” Me: “I don’t think so.” C: “Oh. Well, maybe they just live together.”


3 Responses to “The world according to C”

  1. Susan Says:

    Hysterical.  And I totally agree with her – teachers don\’t need to have babies!

  2. Unknown Says:

    thank you.
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